the knitty professor: PEs New Years Resoluzhuns

Oh, hai! It’s hard to do, friends, but I am going to have to tear myself away from watching kitteh youtube videos long enough to join Perry to give you our New Year’s Resoluzhuns for 2009.

Resoluzhun #1: Find new and even more annoying ways to wake up the humans. Howling, scratching our claws down the walls, and walking repeatedly across their chests – just not cutting it anymore. We have to step it up.

Resoluzhun #2: Grow an opposable thumb so we can open the pantry door whenever we want! We know that’s where all the good stuff is hidden.

Resoluzhun #3: Take more baths.

A kitteh can never be too clean. Especially with all of these dirty humans around touching you all the time. Ew.

Resoluzhun #4: Make it further than ten feet out the apartment door. Finally figure out where it is that the silly humans keep going!

Resoluzhun #5: Build an international network of kittehs – Phase 1 of the plan to bring down the veterinary industry. Our slogan?

Kittehs of the world, unite! We have nothing to lose but our cat carriers!

Resoluzhun #6: Actually catch one of the birdies that flies past the window. (We know we can do it!)

Resoluzhun #7: Develop a once-a-day catnip habit. The current “whenever the humans remember that there’s a catnip stash in the house” routine isn’t an addiction – it’s just a tease.

Resoluzhun #8: KILL THE TOY!